This is one thing I battled with most of my life due to low self-esteem. I used to get livid when others would so justly say, "You must feel worthy, deserving and confident to achieve your goals". The individuals that would continue to tell me this didn't seem to know the how-to to get to this worthy and deserving place. And to tell you the truth, it just doesn't happen miraculously. Repeating an affirmation of, "I am worthy and deserving" and faking it to make it, didn't do the trick either!
A healthy self-esteem is developed during childhood, and if not established, the individual will adapt a highly exaggerated and incorrect belief about themselves. A child that is consistently, berated, abused, criticized, teased, ridiculed, ignored or expected to be perfect can develop a poor self-image.
According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), approx. 1 in 4 Americans are diagnosed each year with low self-esteem (lack of self-worth) as an underlying issue. Depression, eating disorders, suicide, drug and alcohol abuse, social withdrawal, arrogance, needing constant validation and much more, are attributed to this core problem. They call it a disorder. I call it an imbalance in our energy field.
Deepak Chopra, in The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire, states that when we see ourselves for less than who we are, creating anger, resentment or hostility (I would also like to add low self-image), there is a "disruption of electromagnetic in the heart". I believe we are tuning ourselves out from our own loving energy source and directing it toward the dysfunctionally created ego caused by the 'peanut' gallery. Self-sabotaging beliefs, thoughts, emotions and behaviours set in when these unconscious recordings continue to replay in our head. We act in a "fragmented manner" creating doubt, confusion and fear causing dis-ease and dis-harmony.
What do we do to begin the creation of a high self-image?
First, STOP listening to the 'peanut' gallery. No matter how hard it is.
Begin the process of embracing your whole self; your good sides and the less appealing sides. The less time you focus on your less appealing side, the less it will be hanging around.
Sever the identification of who you think you are through your parents or peers eyes (or whomever it may be, and it may be you too).
Recognize the repeated recordings in your head for what they are. Feel them without judgement and let them go. Remember to breath.
If you have a tough time with some feelings that arise, ask for your Higher Power to guide you. Close your eyes and go within. Feel your Self through the pain. Be with you!
Once you let go of these falsely implanted negative beliefs, your trust in who you are will begin to come forth. And the feelings of being worthy and deserving will arise.
You are definitely most deserving and worthy. No one else but you can tell you this. Uncover It and live with freedom.
